Top 10 Things To Do In Church(gullu style)

1. Find an empty seat, and ask the person next to it: "Is this seat SAVED?"
2. Wear an ankh or a new-age crystal pendant.
3. If there is a crying baby, go over and tell the mother: "IF YOU DON'T SHUT THAT GODDAMN THING UP SO HELP ME GOD I'LL KILL IT!!!"
4. Dress all in black, or in camo.
5. Hide near the baptismal pool with a block of sodium. At the first mention of "fire and brimstone", throw it in.
6. Make the sun reflect off your watch into the preacher's face.
7. During the service, play with plastic dinosaurs. If someone asks what you're doing, tell them: "These are dinosaurs. They ruled the earth over 65 million years ago."
8. Snicker every time the preacher talks about someone being stoned, especially Stephen.
9. Ask someone what they think about the Book of Peleponnesians. After they tell you, inform them that there is no Book of Peleponnesians.
10. Write on the bathroom wall: "The eyes of the LORD are upon you!!!"